Sensitivity

We recently had an issue blow itself way out of proportion here and to me it presents an issue which people don't seem to understand.

First, some background.

One of our All Blacks, a man by the name of Piri Weepu, was featured in an anti-smoking television advertisment. Well, it was more about being smokefree in the home. In the ad, he was feeding an infant. Bottle-feeding.

So, an organisation comes out and calls for a ban on the ad because they feel it might encourage women to, get this, stop breast-feeding their babies.

Yes, I understand the power of advertising. I do, after all, work in the media and I have studied advertising, so I do know what influence a few micro-seconds can do. However, I have serious doubts about the validity of their argument.

This point has been debated, and I don't want to go too deeply into that. What I do want to comment on is the lack of sensitivity that has been shown by some of these so-called advocates. I will not go so far in this blog as to call them a particular name which really has little to do with what they're advocating and more to do with a certain historical period and honestly the analogy really does not seem appropriate.

I have heard of women who say they have been approached and verbally attacked for bottle-feeding their babies, in full view of the public. This is not about feeding a baby in public. These attacks are more to do with the fact that these women choose to bottle-feed their babies.

I'm not a mother, unfortunately, but if I was, and I was able to, I would choose breast-feeding. However, that does not mean I will go up to a mother in public and verbally attack her for choosing to bottle-feed. For one thing, I was bottle-fed. I cannot say for myself whether this had any effect on me either way because I am close to my mother. We have always had a fairly close relationship.

So here is my opinion on this particular matter. Think before you speak. There could be any number of reasons why the mother is bottle-feeding. Cancer, not enough milk, other health issues. Imagine going up to a woman in this situation and verbally attacking her, only to find out the reason she is bottle-feeding is because she has had breast cancer and is on chemotherapy. Now, imagine even a worst-case scenario, that woman's cancer is terminal. How bad would you feel then?

Please, if you read this and find yourself in this situation, or witness this kind of situation, THINK.

I've been accused of being too sensitive. In a lot of ways, it has been a hurdle. I have a deep sense of compassion and morality. Yes, that can make me opinionated too. I do not deny that. The reason for that is I was bullied as a child, and it has continued to affect my life in many ways. But at least I have the sensitivity and compassion, and the empathy to see two sides of situations.

I just watched the most incredible movie. This is, in every way, related to the subject of sensitivity. The movie was about a man named Brad Cohen, who suffers from Tourette's Syndrome. It horrified me that he would be called all sorts of names, or be labelled a trouble-maker because he could not control his symptoms. But this man went on to become an inspiration, and I applaud him for not giving up. For making his disability work for him, rather than against him. The subject also forces people to look at the subject of disabilities from a different perspective.

I get why people are so ignorant about these particular subjects. Anything that is outside the norm makes them uncomfortable. But the fact is, people are different. The English poet William Cowper said "Variety is the spice of life, That gives it all its flavor". To use another analogy, if ice-cream were only ever one flavour, we'd soon become bored of it. All I'm saying is, differences in people should be celebrated and appreciated. Not vilified.

The bigger person is one who chooses to use compassion and sensitivity, not ignorance and condemnation.